Finally understand that sort of feelings where we know how much longer we can live, where we discover the lifespan of one particular circle or even relationship; it isn’t easy after all, is it? As if we are actually counting down to the day we die, instead of one meaningful day or event. Personally know that each chapter has its very own limitations, not only in the sense of how far it may go, but also how different things may be in the days to come; just that, it has been much easier to think than to carrying out the tasks. Guess that’s just the way it is. Seeing the future can indeed be torturing at times and very often we wonder whether we are able to change it; the answer is yet to be found. One of the problems of able to see the future is, we will be put into dilemma and stuck in between two different conscious living in us; to change or not to change, to do or not to do, to speak or not to speak. Even if we know the exact date where everything is coming to an end, we still can’t help it but to feel despair and hurt; simply because we care. Though we are to enjoy those particular moments to the very end, we can’t help it but to feel miserable and helpless; simply because we are not ready to let go. A bit more to go before we enter a new year; till then I hope, I am ready to be gone.
